Why Condiment King is the worst villain
Dick: Okay, you go out and didtract him, and I'll come in from the back to get him
Robin Jason: What? No! You distract him
Dick: It'll only be for a little bit.
Robin Jason: No
Dick: I did it when I was Robin
Robin Jason: Then you can do it again
Dick: You'll be fine, he's a D lister at best
Robin Jason: You know that's not the problem! I have school tomorrow, and I don't want to smell like ketchup for the whole day
Dick: [sighs] Alright, fine. Let's just settle this like professionals
Robin Jason: Fine
Dick and Jason: Rock... paper... scissors... shoot!
Robin Jason: [does rock]
Dick: [does paper]
Robin Jason: Ughhh, Fine
Dick: You got this buddy. I believe in you!
Robin Jason: [walking away and grumbling] I hate you
Dick: I love you too!
-
[Approximately 5 minutes later, with Condiment King tied up]
Dick: And that's what I call a success
Robin Jason: [covered in a disgusting mixture of ranch dressing, mustard, barbecue sauce, and ketchup] For you maybe
Dick: Hey, it could have been worse. He could have shot pickles or something at you
Robin Jason: Asshole
Robin Jason: [suddenly starts smirking] Hey, you know how you're always wanting to give me a hug? Well, I could really use a hug right now
[Dick and Jason lock eyes for a solid 10 seconds]
Dick: [bolts] I'm social distancing from little brothers right now!
Robin Jason: [running after him] Get back here you coward!
Dick: Go hug Batman! I have a date tonight!
Robin Jason: Batman's not! Hope your date likes ranch dressing!
[Dick and Jason continue to chase each other for the rest of patrol]
-
Condiment King: So am I just supposed to sit here until the cops show up??