@genderqueer-klinger asking the important questions: why didn’t hawkeye faint on the show, it would have been:
1. easy opportunity for more hawkeye whump (which alan et al clearly enjoyed) + hawkeye getting fussed about (which alan et al also clearly enjoyed)
2. easily explained in canon, since he subsists of martinis and 4 hours of sleep every few days or so and has to work for 30+ hours at a time and his body is skin and bones
3. i bet alan alda could fall down really well. i bet he’d have talked about how good he is at falling over and then we all could have seen it and politely clapped and gone “yes alan, you are so good at falling down” and he’d still be talking proudly about it 50 years later
4. they should’ve looked into the future and seen how much the tumblrs would have loved it
@genderqueer-klinger #I need him to faint I need him to swoon#I need him to have a case of the vapours#I want Benjamin Franklin Hawkeye Pierce to pass out like a victorian housewife in need of some seaside air between your this and my image of him lounging like a muse on a chaise lounge and getting nude painted, I think you and I have a particular Need
love the thread of people saying someone should pick him up in their big strong arms – nobody is specifying a preference, we all just agree that it should be someone and that is because we know that almost everyone at the 4077th could carry this lanky boneless man bridal-style should he swoon from exhaustion