Something That We're Not - Xavier Thorpe - Part 2!
A/N: WOW! Over 700 of you liked part one and it's unbelievable! Thank you! ❤️ I really enjoy writing for the Wednesday characters so let me know if you have any requests ❤️
T/W: Mentions of Death, Not Eating and Smoking. Please look after yourselves!
Tagged: @snips-501 @vanillaarr @eviethetheatrefreak @idli-dosa - I think this is everyone that asked to be tagged! I'm sorry if I missed you!!
W/C 3.9K
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"She's over here!" Ajax's voice rang clear in your head, then crying. Enid, Enid was crying for you. You wanted so desperately to open your eyes and tell her that it was okay, as long as they lived, dying was a consequence you'd take, but your body wouldn't respond.
"If you get to experience the sweet relief of death before I do, I'll drag your soul back here and you will know no peace in the afterlife." Wednesday.
You could sense the three of them crowding your body, you could hear them bickering over the best ways to help you and to get you help. Wednesday was doing her best to heal the smaller wounds that she could but God did your body hurt, every small movement they made sent shards of pain through your body from the tips of your toes to the top of your head, radiating like heat.
"Watch her wings! You're hurting her!" Xavier snapped at his friends. Xavier. He was here, he came. Something in your chest pulled taut, like a thread connecting you to him, you could feel it, you could feel him. The anguis, the anger, all of it. You could see it in the darkness that had engulfed you, a shimmering golden thread connected to your chest and going off into the darkness. Pain shot through your body as he moved you gently so your head was on his lap. "Ajax go and get help! Don't just stand there!" You'd never heard that tone in his voice before. "Keep holding on Y/N, please don't let go." You did the only thing you could do, you grabbed onto that thread and pulled.
Xavier stiffened at the tautness that had just shot through his chest, like something was pulling at his heart. His eyes shot down to your face, bloody and bruised as it was, it was like he knew it was you pulling at him, telling him that you were still there. "You're crying." Wednesday wasn't asking him if he was crying, she was stating that he was, he hadn't even noticed the tears running down his cheeks, he didn't even look at Wednesday as he said. "I didn't get to say goodbye." Wednesday knelt next to him. You so desperately wanted to tell him not to cry, that you hated that he was this sad. "Her breathing is getting worse! We need help, why is no one helping?!" Wednesday laid her hand on his shoulder, a rare act of comfort from the girl.
Then, almost as if they were watching it happen in slow motion, your chest stopped moving and the darkness finally engulfed you.
How do you explain to someone that you're there, but not really there? Something had been amiss in your head since you woke up, weeks later, in the Addams home of all places. Everything was fuzzy, you felt fuzzy. Your friends sobbed when you stumbled into the living room where they'd all been sitting quietly, all of them dressed in black, even Enid. "Who died?" You asked, voice still weak, while doing a headcount, Wednesday? Check. Enid? Check. Ajax? Check. Xavier? Xavier wasn't there, you couldn't see him, which was unusual considering he stood at least a head taller than Ajax. Your friends blinked at you in disbelief before and you started to panic, started pulling on that thread attached to your chest, he couldn't be gone, he couldn't be.
A glass smashed behind you and you span as fast as your body would allow and relief flooded your system. Xavier. You'd barely thought his name before the boy had swept you off your feet and into his arms, he was sobbing into your neck. Enid threw herself at the pair of you, Ajax following her, even Wednesday joined the group hug. "Seriously though, who died? Enid is wearing all black." They all shared a look you didn't understand and Wednesday opened her mouth to speak but Xavier, who was still clinging onto cut her off. "No one, no one died." Wednesday shot him a look, Ajax and Enid looked skeptical but no one corrected him.
You hadn't returned to school. Your friends only had a couple of weeks left before the semester ended and with you already staying with the Addams, Enid, Ajax and Xavier had opted to spend their summers here as well. Mortica and Gomez had welcomed you with open arms, Pugsley was your constant shadow, Thing had taken to following you and the young boy and you were convinced he was going to report everything back to Wednesday as soon as she arrived home.
Your friends checked on you constantly via the group chat that you all had, thanks to Enid.Wednesday hated the group chat. Xavier had taken to messaging you separately and would video call you almost every night. It became your favorite part of the day.
"Why does it feel like I can feel you sometimes?" He asked, he was high, you could tell by his eyes and the lazy smile on his face. "You've smoked too much." You laughed back, not wanting to tell him the real reason. "No I haven't!" He whined like a child. "I'm serious, I could feel you, that night, when we found you, I felt you when you woke up, I can feel you now. I've been able to feel you for a long time I think, I just refused to believe it" He continued on. "Xav-" He cut you off. "Is it a Fae thing? Please don't lie to me." You sighed, how were you meant to tell him that yes, it was a Fae thing, something he shouldn't be able to feel at all, something reserved only for soulmates. You'd just got him back, this would surely push him away again.
"You're panicking." His voice floated through the phone. You hated that he could feel this, could feel everything you felt. "It's a Fae thing." You confirmed. "I haven't put a spell on you or anything so don't panic, I'll tell you about it in person, when you're here for the summer maybe?" He hummed in agreement.
"Go to sleep, Xav, I can tell you're fighting it." His lazy smile quirked a little. "Wanna talk to you, miss you." He mumbled. You smiled back at him. "I miss you too, but we text all day and you'll be here tomorrow." His smile grew. "Not gonna let you outta my sight all summer." You grinned. "I'm sure Wednesday will love that." He shrugged. "There's nothing going on like that between me and Wednesday, not anymore." Your smile fell slightly. "I'm sorry, I know you really liked her." He shrugged again. "I'm not sure I did." Silence fell between you at his confession, he wasn't sure he really liked her? "Stop thinking so hard Y/N." You let out a breath you didn't even know you were holding. "You look cosy." He spoke again. "Fall asleep with me?" He asked as he himself got properly into bed and curled into his covers. "Always." You smiled back at him. Except, you didn't sleep, you hadn't since you'd woken up. You'd told no one other than Thing and that's only because he'd caught you night after night, creeping around the house like a ghost. You'd sworn Thing to secrecy.
Instead you watched Xavier sleep, watched his face and body relax as sleep took him, still wearing that same sleepy smile and waited for the feeling of warmth and contentment that filled your chest when he fell asleep, that he unknowingly sent down the link between the two of you.
"Would you like to go with Lurch to pick up Wednesday and your friends Miss Y/L/N?" Mortica asked you at breakfast the next day. If they'd picked up on the fact you hadn't been eating they never said, you took a sip of your coffee and Pugsley answered his mother before you could. "We're going to see if she can still fly today, right Y/N?" He asked, his big pleading eyes staring into your soul. You smiled at the boy who you'd come to love like a little brother in the weeks you'd stayed with the Addams. "That's right Pugsley, I did say we could do that, I'm sure with all of their stuff it'd be more comfortable on the journey back if I stayed here." Mortica smiled at you, Gomez nodded at you and then to Lurch who turned without a word and left. "We need to help clear up breakfast first, Pugsley." You told him he rolled his eyes but immediately started clearing his plate and stacking the empty dishes. "Wash them up for us darling, your father and I need to talk to Y/N, she'll come and find you when she's done."
"Are you worried about seeing your friends?" Mortica asked as soon as Pugsley had cleared the table and was out of earshot, a gentle smile on her face. "I'm not sure how I feel about it to be honest. I love them all dearly but I also kept secrets from them about the Fae, about who I was and they nearly died because of it." Gomez cleared his throat. "But they didn't, you put yourself between them, you nearly died covering them as they ran for safety, you showed them who you really are, on the inside." Mortica took her husband's hand and smiled at him. "That's right, besides, I get a feeling that boy can't wait to see you, the tall one?" You looked at her teasing smile. "Xavier?" She nodded. "We're just friends." You shrugged. Gomez snorted a laugh. "Just friends? He was inconsolable about your-" Mortica elbowed him. "About my what?" You asked, your eyebrows knitting in confusion. "He misspoke dear, Xavier was distraught when you were hurt, go now, Pugsley will be waiting for you." You smiled at them and stood. "Thank you, both, for taking me in, I don't have my own family to go to." Gomez smiled up at you from his seat. "This is your family now."
Just like his parents had said, Pugsley was waiting for you in the garden, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He grinned when he saw you coming. "Do you really think you'll be able to fly?!" He asked, an almost childlike wonder sounded in his voice. "I sure hope so, Pugs, or these will be pretty useless?" You flinched slightly as your wings appeared, healed but still sore from the arrows and the fight you had taken up to protect your friends and Xavier. Pugsley gasped as he took them in. "Can I touch them?" He asked, a hand already reaching towards them, normally the answer would be a solid no, but you couldn't deny him, not with the look of awe on his face.
It had been a long few hours in the garden with little success. How you'd allowed Pugsley to drag you up to the tallest tower in the house and stood beside him, balancing precariously on the small balcony you didn't know. "Maybe you just need to jump from a higher point?" He asked looking up at you. "Then your flying instincts should kick in right?" You heard the gates of the driveway open in the distance as you looked down at Pugsley standing next to you. "I'm not sure about this." He shook his head at you. "You just have to believe you can do it." A strong gust of wind almost sent you off balance and your stomach rolled. "Y/N! What the hell are you doing?!" Xavier's voice and Enid's scream cut through the sound of the wind. You didn't have time to answer them before Pugsley did. "She's flying!" He said as he shoved you off of the balcony.
Free falling was an interesting feeling, it also made you think of that one song by Tom Petty. You could hear the screaming below you as you fell towards the ground and you could feel wings twitching. "Your wings, Y/N! Use your wings!" Pugsley was screaming at you from the balcony. You forced yourself to turn so you were coming at the ground face first and forced your wings open to their full span, ignoring the pain that shot through you at doing so. The wind caught in your wings, slowing your fall as you glided towards the ground, still far to fast, you braced yourself to collide with the ground but it never happened, instead you hit something warm and it let out a groan as you and it tumbled along the driveway. You opened one eye to see Xavier, he'd thrown himself at you to break your fall. "Are you okay?" You gasped, realising that he and his back had taken the brunt of tumbling down the driveway, his arms locking you into his chest so it wasn't you that got hurt. "I think so." He groaned. You could hear the others approaching and Pugsley screaming your name. "Yknow, if you wanted me under you, you could've just asked." Xavier teased as you took in the position the two of you were in, you with your legs either side of his hips, his hands now sitting at your waist from where you'd pushed yourself up to check if he was okay.
"I'm sorry Y/N! I was only trying to help!" Pugsley was sobbing by your side, Wednesday was glaring at her brother. Ajax offered you his hand to pull you off of the ground and Xavier. Enid pulled you into a hug. "If you wanted his attention there are better ways to do it than jumping off of a balcony." She whispered to you and you gently elbowed her. "She's right." Xavier's voice coming from behind you made you jump and Enid was grinning like a fool.
"Wednesday says she's going to string me up by my toes!" Pugsley wailed as he threw his arms around your waist. "That's not very nice, Wednesday, he was trying to help." Wednesday rolled her eyes. "He pushed you off the balcony." You didn't have a chance to respond as Mortica and Gomez came sweeping out of the house. You tugged on Xavier's hand. "Let's go clean the scrapes on your back." He nodded and followed you into the mansion.
The first two weeks of summer had flown by. You'd spend your days with your friends, watching them play games in the sunshine while you hid under the shade of a tree in the garden, the sun, something you used to love now made you feel uncomfortable, too hot in your skin. Evenings were spent under a different tree, sat on a blanket with Xavier pointing out different constellations or making his drawings come to life. Xavier had taken to sitting with you during the day as well, drawing in his sketchbook as to not seem like he was keeping any eye on you. He'd noticed the changes within you, they all had. They shared looks and whispers, as if they all knew something you didn't.
It wasn't until the third week when you overheard them talking that you knew something was really wrong & something was being kept from you. "We need to tell her." Wednesday snapped, a scoff sounded from Xavier. "Why? She's okay, she's here with us." He asked her. "But she's not meant to be!" She'd snapped at him again. "She's not okay Xavier & you know it." He sighed. "I can't Wednesday. I feel her, we're connected, in ways I can't explain." Wednesday sighed this time. "She has a right to know Xavier." You could hear him pacing. "Is this what you both think as well?" He directed his question to who you assumed was Enid and Ajax but you were surprised when it was Mortica that answered. "Yes, she needs to know, there's clearly something between the two of you that needs to be resolved but this, she needs to know." You heard Gomez hum in agreement and backed away from the door as you turned to leave, you heard Wednesday offer to tell you whatever it was together and Xavier reply to her. "No, I'll do it."
"Thing, do you know what they were talking about?" Thing didn't answer you. That told you more than enough, everyone in the house but you knew. You'd taken to hiding in your room for the rest of the day, not even Pugsley could convince you to leave. A knock sounded and the door opened, and there he was, your artist stood in the doorway. "You missed dinner, you hungry?" You shook your head. "Walk with me?" He asked as he held his hand out to you, you sighed and accepted his hand, letting him lead you out of the house and into the gardens. He didn't let go of your hand once. You reached the usual tree the two of you sat under until the early hours and found the blanket already there. Xavier sat first, pulling you down with him. He was nervous, he looked nervous and he didn't meet your eyes. "Xav, what's going on? I heard you talking to Wednesday and her parents earlier. I've seen the looks you all give me, the way you all looked at me when I woke up, please tell me what's going on?" He met your eyes. "Will you tell me why I can feel you first?" He asked quietly and your heart squeezed, it was time to come clean.
"The Fae, they have something called Mates. It goes beyond falling in love or soulmates. To the full blooded Fae it's everything and it's very rare. To have a Mate means you're connected by your very souls, that the urge to protect them, love them and keep them safe and happy comes before anything else. Mates can feel what the other is feeling, it's how they know when they're in danger, it's how they find each other when they're separated. For one Mate to die is like torture for the other and there isn't anything that can fill that void. Some learn to live with it, others are driven mad by the loss." His eyes were roaming your face but you didn't meet them. "So, me and you? You and I? Are-" you nodded. "I think so. But you aren't Fae, I should be able to feel you, but you shouldn't be able to feel me, that I can't work out." Xavier let out a breath. "I don't expect anything from you, Xav. For you to understand or accept this or me, I just wanted to be honest with you. I'm just happy to have you in my life at all." His hand cupped your cheek as he ran his thumb along your cheekbone. "I need to tell you something now." You nodded. "Go ahead."
Xavier sighed before he started talking. "We came looking for you when my chest started to ache like nothing I'd ever felt before, I don't know how I knew it was you but I did, I took off to find you, barely explaining to the others why but they knew who I was looking for and it was Ajax and Enid that found you. God Y/N when I looked at you, I was so angry, angry and the Fae for hurting you, angry at you for putting yourself in danger for us, angry at myself for leaving you there alone, I've never known anger like it. Ajax and Enid went for help but they were taking so long and Wednesday and I-" His voice broke and tears were lining his eyes, you took his hand and squeezed it. "Wednesday and I, we watched you die, Y/N." You blinked at him twice, you died? "But the paramedics, they brought me back right? I'm here with you right now so they brought me back?" He squeezed your hand and took a deep breath. "No, they didn't. When you woke up here and found us and asked us who had died, it was you, we were having a wake for you." You pulled away from him. "But how? Once your dead your dead but I'm here, I'm real!" He pulled you back to him, placing you between his legs, your back to his chest.
"When you died in front of us, it was like something inside me cracked and I could see this little golden thread, Wednesday thinks I was seeing things but I could see it, this thread that connected me to you and it was getting darker and darker so I grabbed it and pulled, I held onto it so tight and I haven't let go of it, the part I'm holding is the only part that's still golden. It was like I exploded, there was some kind of force that left me and went straight into you. Then three days later, you waltzed into that living room like nothing had happened. The others wanted to tell you straight away, wanted to find a way to help you move on but I was selfish, I wanted to keep you." You started to sob, clinging onto Xavier's arm that he'd wrapped around you. "I'm so sorry Y/N." He mumbled over and over again. "I'm dead." It wasn't a question, part of you already knew that you were.
You weren't sure how long the two of you had sat there, but you tears had stopped and dried on your face but Xavier was still holding onto you tightly. "Can I have 6 pages from your sketchbook and a pencil?" You asked him quietly. He nodded and handed you the book and pencil and you started scribbling. When you'd finished with each page he watched you tear it out and fold it in half, writing one word on the folded side. When you'd done all 6 you turned to face him. "Xavier, you need to let me go." He tensed. "How can you expect me to do that when you've just told me that we're fated? When I tried so hard to keep you here?" Tears were running down his face now but he continued talking. "When I've only just figured out way too late that I love you? How am I meant to say goodbye and let you go?" You wiped the tears from his eyes. "You don't have to say goodbye Xav, I'll always be here." You said as you touched his heart. "And here." You flipped through the pages of his sketchbook. "I'll always be listening for you, so you can still talk to me if you need to and I'll be waiting for you on the other side, once you've lived a long and happy life. I can't wait to hear all about everything you do and achieve, but you have to let go, you have to live for both of us. Make sure my letters get to Wednesday, Enid and Ajax, to Mortica, Gomez and Pugsley, there's one for you as well." You handed him the pages you'd taken from his sketchbook. "I love you, Xav." He opened his mouth to speak but you continued. "It's not good for either of us to hold on, so don't say goodbye, just kiss me once, so I know what it's like and let me go." He wiped the tears from your cheeks. "I'll miss you." He said, voice broken. "I'll miss you too." You whispered back. He did as you asked, he kissed you and let go of the last bit of golden thread he'd been holding onto. He only stopped kissing you when you stopped kissing him and your body slumped against his.
Wednesday found him hours later, still cradling your body.
I’ve never cried this hard before from reading a fanfic 😭
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