There for you
Pairing: Stephen Strange x f!reader
Word count: 975 words
Content: Angst, unrequited feelings, Stephen pining over Christine
A/N: Either Stephen suffers or you do I’m sorry.
“I don’t know why I’m telling you all this.” Stephen muttered, laughing quietly at himself. “I don’t mind listening.” You hummed, bringing the can of coke to your lips. Stephen stared at you from his seat beside you, “It’s always me ranting, never you.” You stared at the cityscape before the two of you, “Am i suppose to treat you like a diary then? Dear Stephen, today i woke up at 7am and took a full shift.” You snarked. Stephen huffed in annoyance, “It’s just- I don’t know. I have not told anyone about this.” Stephen admitted. The glimmer of hope flickered in your heart, the dangerous glimmer of hope that you let yourself believe in, that maybe you meant more to him than just a friend.
The both of you sat in silence, it was 2am, the both of you found yourself in the same routine these days. If both of you took the Night Shift, you could find each other here having a small break, usually you. You would sit here the moment you had some free time, on the rooftop of the hospital where you could enjoy your peace and admire the cityscape before you. When Stephen started joining you here on the rooftop, you have also started frequenting it more often, hoping that he’ll find you sitting here, and like these days, have late night talks with you.
You would never admit it to anyone but you had feelings for the doctor sitting beside you. At first, you thought it was just admiration, he is a very talented, smart and successful surgeon after all. Then you admitted that you found him attractive and when you finally got to talk to him and get to know him, you found yourself head over heels for Stephen Strange.
“Maybe I would tell Christine, but these days it’s been hard to catch her.” Stephen spoke. There it was, as quickly as the glimmer of hope was ignited it was extinguished just as quickly. You shifted uneasily, massaging the tension that had build up in your body, clenching your jaw slightly. “But it’s nice telling you too.” Stephen continued, looking at you with an appreciative smile. You forced a smile back at him. “I’m honoured to be a replacement.”you tried to joke, it wasn’t suppose to come out just as bitter. Stephen frowned, “You’re not a replacement.” He reassured, gauging you. You looked away, your cheeks hurting from trying to force a smile for him. Running your hands through your hair in an attempt to wipe the tears that had formed. “There’s just some things that I want to tell her, to get it off my chest, but I don’t have the chance to.” Stephen continued, you honestly didn’t know what to say anymore, too troubled and drowning in self pity. How did you get yourself into this state? Where you had to listen to someone you liked pine over someone else.
“Honestly? I’m really confused about Christine and I. I don’t know, I just feel the need to be close to her but we already broke up, i don’t think I like her that way anymore.” Stephen continued. You wanted to scream at him, stomp off in anger, ask him to shut the fuck up about his love life, that you weren’t strong enough to give him advice on his love life. Instead, you sat there, swallowing the lump in your throat and downing the coke in your hand, trying your best to remain in control of your emotions.
You checked the time on your phone, relieved to see it reach 3am. You faked a yawn, “My shift’s over. I’ll get going now, sorry I’ll listen more but I’m exhausted. Another day?” Stephen nodded, giving you a soft smile. “Of course yeah, get some rest, don’t overwork yourself.” His words was simple but so caring, you had to mentally reprimand yourself for the warm feeling in your heart upon hearing his words.
=================================
Day after day, you would buy a drink and sit at the rooftop. Stephen hasn’t shown up since the last time he confessed he may still have feelings for Christine. Love makes you an idiot, you sat there telling yourself because you liked the atmosphere up there but the real truth was that you were waiting for him. Afraid that one day if he had a bad day or needed a listening ear and no one was there for him, you wanted to be with him, supporting him, even if he may not return the same sentiments.
It was like having cold water splattered to your face. You had just finished your Night Shift at 6am, prepared to pass the shift on, when you ran into them.
Stephen and Christine walked together, coffee in hand. He was smiling and laughing, she was too. When his eyes met yours, he gave you a nod of acknowledgment before brushing past you. You clenched your fists, biting harshly onto your lip. The reason for your hurt now was because of your own delusions. Stephen had been honest to you from the start, he was only talking to you because you were free, it was late night, scientific studies have shown that people tend to be more vulnerable in the late night too. Stephen had told you too, he told you things that he wished he could tell Christine. It was your own fault that you fed into your own delusions, everytime he appeared and spilled a little more about himself, you made yourself think you were special, that he was only telling you this.
And yet, even after all the pain.
You found yourself waiting for him everyday rain or shine at the rooftop, just in case he needed someone.
Despite everything he put you through, you still hoped to be there for him
